Some silly shit to start my week with:

The Borowitz Report

JD Vance to Serve Rest of Ghislaine Maxwell’s Prison Term
Jul 28

EDINBURGH, SCOTLAND (The Borowitz Report)—Donald J. Trump revealed on Monday that JD Vance has agreed to serve the remainder of Ghislaine Maxwell’s prison sentence for her.

“JD wasn’t thrilled about it, quite frankly,” Trump told reporters. “He was crying like a dog.”

“I told him to be a man,” he said. “It’s only 20 years.”

As for Maxwell, Trump said, “I wish her well,” adding that he that he expects her to be “a terrific vice president.”